Hungry Horace

Posted in food, football on February 7, 2010 – 11:19 pm
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It’s 10:30 at night, Match of the Day is on TV, but all I can think about is food. I’m starving! I’ve already had a bowl of chocolate weetabix minis and a caramel chunky kitkat, but they haven’t worked and my belly is still gurgling away and I’m getting very frustrated. I’m even considering a bowl of soup now. Trouble is, all I’ve got is French Onion and Cream of Asparagus. What on Earth made me buy those two? There must be something better in there to do a job on my hunger? Oh hang on – yes! yes! I’ve found a tin of Tomato stuff! Marvellous. Straight in the microwave with that then………… and it seems to have worked. Now settling down to watch the Mackems on telly. I know I went to the game, and watched it last night. It’s on again now. Bet we still don’t win. ;-)

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An idiot’s guide to buying a fake Rolex

Posted in general on July 3, 2009 – 12:00 am
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Even the word ‘replica’ suggests that the product you’re buying is legal-ish – a ‘tribute’ to the original rather than a blatant rip-off.

Every day, along with kind offers to provide me with Viagra or make me rich overnight, someone invites me to purchase a luxury Swiss watch at a fraction of the normal price. OK, so the timepiece in question might not be a genuine Rolex, Cartier or Patek Philippe, but according to the spam emails that pour into my inbox, these ‘replicas’ are made to such a high standard that I’d be a mug to spend three or four grand on the real thing.

Strikingly similar- but which Rolex Submariner is genuine and which is the fake?

THE TELL-TALE SIGNS

1. Rolex watches are fitted with a sapphire crystal (the glass face of the watch) that can only be scratched with a diamond.

2. The ‘cyclops’ date window in a real version is dead centred above the number.

3. The quality of the printing on the dial should be perfect, with indicators and type evenly spaced and no fuzzy edges.

4. The genuine Rolex movement sweeps smoothly round at about 28,800 revs per hour – each second is broken down into eight steps. Even when a fake uses a Swiss-made movement, the second hand’s ticking is usually visibly jerky.

5. Over where ‘Swiss made’ appears, the brand’s logo is laser-etched into the crystal. In a genuine Rolex, this is made up of hundreds of dots set at different heights throughout the crystal (so it doesn’t create a weakness in the glass) and as such is barely visible – to see it clearly you have to look through a loupe (the small magnifying glass used by jewellers and watchmakers).

6. If you remove a Rolex bracelet you should find the watch’s case number and model number engraved on the side at six o’clock  and 12 o’clock .

(The watch on the left is the fake)

In the old days, counterfeit Rolexes were so poorly made that not even a blind chimp would mistake one for the real thing. They conferred upon the wearer an aura of tacky desperation, not cool. Nowadays, it’s a different story. The old tell-tale giveaways – sloppy printing, soft metal and cheap quartz movements that made the second hand clunk its way round the dial – have been eradicated.

Good fakes feel substantial, keep decent time and have the patina of high quality. Some are so convincing that the only way to tell they’re fake is to take the back off.

Most now use proper mechanical movements and sometimes boast transparent ‘exhibition’ backs so you can see the wonders of horology for yourself.

Even the word ‘replica’ suggests that the product you’re buying is legal-ish – a ‘tribute’ to the original rather than a blatant rip-off.

As a result of all these improvements, the counterfeiters now charge much higher prices. Their justification? That just as with supermarket ‘own brand’ goods, you’re buying practically the same thing as the genuine article, but without some greedy brand taking a huge profit.

The first website I visit – let’s call it website A – sells replica Rolexes for a reassuringly expensive £400.

Yes, it seems a lot, but surely they wouldn’t have the brass neck to charge such astronomical prices for a fake unless the quality matched the outlay? Then again, they’re criminals, so moral rectitude and offering value for money probably aren’t high on their list of priorities.

Throughout its pages, Website A goes to great pains to stress that, unlike other unscrupulous operators, they’re in the business of selling that gloriously oxymoronic item, the genuine replica. ‘You will not find the same quality replicas elsewhere,’ it trumpets. ‘There may be people who try to represent other fake watches as being Swiss-made but only we can guarantee it.’ How exactly they do this isn’t clear.

Mind you, Website A certainly does come across as reputable. They insist they’ll give you a full refund if you’re not satisfied with your watch, and even mend it when (I mean if…) it breaks.

If you fancy a model that isn’t shown on their existing range, they’ll make it for you to order within three weeks. But the real clincher, for me, is that they invite you to pay using PayPal, the money-transfer system owned by eBay. If PayPal have given Website A an account, they must be legitimate, right?

The watches pictured on the site look great. I decide that for a man of my standing only the finest fake Rolex will do, so I fire off an order for a platinum Yachtmaster, type in my credit card details and press ‘Send’.

The next site I visit (Website B) offers watches at considerably cheaper prices – replica Rolexes cost a mere £100. Bargain! My eye is caught by a Submariner with a black bezel.

OK, so they do warn me that in spite of being a diving watch, my fake Submariner isn’t actually water resistant but hey, for a hundred quid, who’s complaining? Once again, I place my order. My new watch, I am informed, will be with me within three weeks.

Counterfeiting is one of the world’s biggest growth industries and now accounts for five to seven per cent of all global trade. In the UK alone, the black market is worth more than £9 billion. It makes me wonder, have I just broken the law?

I talk to David Grome,  a barrister who specialises in prosecuting cases relating to counterfeit goods. He assures me that while it is theoretically possible to say that someone who knowingly purchases a counterfeit watch is aiding and abetting the commission of the offence by the seller, buyers in the UK (unlike those in France and Italy) are never prosecuted.

This is good news for the 34 per cent of the UK population who admit to having purchased counterfeit goods. Many of us do it while overseas, using excuses like: ‘I buy abroad because that way our country doesn’t lose money on tax.’ Or: ‘It contributes to the local economy of poorer countries.’ But does it really help the locals? Or does it simply line the pockets of some very unpleasant people?

‘Ten years ago, counterfeiting was a cottage industry. Nowadays you really do see the involvement of major organised crime, with links to other activities such as drugs, prostitution or people-smuggling,’ says Grome.

Counterfeiting is perceived as a fairly low-risk, high-profit crime where the professional trader can clear £1 million in a year. I’ve worked on cases where the proceeds of the sale of Class-A drugs were being laundered through counterfeiting operations.’

Most of us believe that buying counterfeit goods is a victimless crime – a bit of fun. But the conditions suffered by the people making the goods are often appalling. According to Grome, the fake Rolexes I’ve ordered are almost certainly made in the Far East. 

There are reports from China of workers being imprisoned so they can’t inform on their bosses. Their families are threatened, and violence and intimidation are part and parcel of the operation. Children are often forced to assemble counterfeit watches and sunglasses as their hands are better suited to handling tiny parts.

Moreover, according to a 2003 Interpol report, the proceeds of counterfeiting have been used to fund terrorism. I’m not suggesting that by buying a fake Rolex I’m contributing directly to the coffers of Al-Qaeda, but the point is, I don’t know.

Putting aside such unpleasant thoughts, when my fake Rolexes arrive, I have to admit I’m impressed.

They feel heavy and solid; to my untrained eye, they’re just like the real thing. The faces are neat, well printed. The one thing that does bother me is that in terms of quality, they’re indistinguishable. OK, so the Yachtmaster bezel moves round a bit more smoothly than the Submariner’s, but otherwise I’m at a loss as to where the extra 300 quid went.

Even more perplexingly, they arrived in identical plain boxes, one red, one black. Could they have come from the same place?

To really know how good they are, I need to compare my watches to the real thing. I make an appointment to see Simon Bodle, managing director of David Morris Stores, which has a thriving concession in Selfridges.

Although he is impressed by the quality of my fakes, he too struggles to see any difference between them. ‘I’d guess that this was the more expensive one,’ he says, gesturing towards the Submariner. Great, so my £100 fake is more convincing than my £400 fake.

He then brings out the genuine versions. They certainly aren’t cheap – David Morris Stores sells the Submariner at £3,290 and the Yachtmaster at a whopping £4,840 – but it’s only when you get your hands on a real Rolex that you see the shortcomings of the replicas. It’s like getting behind the wheel of a Bentley after driving a Fiat Panda. Everything feels smooth to the touch. The links all fit snugly. The watch doesn’t rattle and the bezel glides around effortlessly with no tell-tale clicking sound. The genuine Rolexes are quite simply perfection.

After inspecting the fakes, Bodle guesses that the movements were manufactured by Swiss firm ETA, which is owned by Swatch and supplies most of the Swiss watch industry.

This is confirmed by a quick look at the websites. And yet, just because my fake boasts a genuine Swiss movement, that doesn’t make it anything like a £400 watch.

‘The ETA movement in these fakes probably cost them about a fiver,’ explains Bodle. ‘The case would also have cost about a fiver and the whole thing was probably assembled for 50p in a filthy sweatshop in China in terrible conditions, probably by some children. If you then sell it at £400, that’s an enormous profit.’

In other words, if you think of my fake in automotive terms, what I’ve just bought is a Ford Fiesta masquerading as an Aston Martin, sold to me at the price of an Audi.

A week later, my credit card statement arrives. The £400 payment to Website A shows up with a PayPal reference.

In other words, I have just bought illegal goods using PayPal. Surely this can’t be right? I contact PayPal and explain the situation. They reply with this statement: ‘PayPal in no way endorses illegal activity and we thank you for bringing this matter to our attention. We are reviewing the account in question and will investigate in accordance with our policy.’

They stress that, ‘PayPal is an electronic money payment service rather than a banking or escrow service. PayPal is not a guarantor of any transaction.’

However, they do have an Acceptable Use Policy which states, ‘You may not use PayPal to sell counterfeits, unauthorised replicas, or otherwise unauthorised items, such as counterfeit watches, handbags, or other accessories.’ Which is what Website A is doing. Therefore, as a result of Live’s enquiry, its PayPal account has been frozen.

So, I’m now in possession of two fake Rolexes. I have aided and abetted an illegal act and delivered a 4,000 per cent profit to organised crime. At this stage, if I’d bought a genuine Swiss watch, I’d be feeling on top of the world. Instead, I feel like a total mug.

Originally posted in the Daily Mail on 16th May 2008 by Damon Syson
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Would you like to try something new?

Posted in jobs, money, north east england on July 2, 2009 – 12:00 am
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Click and watch the video

Click and watch the video

http://www.extra1000.co.uk

Have you just lost your job or just want to try something new? I discovered this little gem and have never looked back.

It’s a recession-proof business because people will always need utilities, and you can have a slice.

Telecom plus is a major British Plc valued at over £200 million and operating within a fast expanding consumer driven market worth in excess of £20 billion. This site offers the facts about Telecom plus and the Utility Warehouse Discount Club and an outstanding business opportunity that is creating wealth and a lifetime of residual income for thousands of existing Utility Warehouse Distributors.

Whether you’re seeking flexible home-based work, an additional profit centre for your business, a pension top-up or a complete change of direction that will pay you what you’re really worth, Telecom plus and the Utility Warehouse may offer the solution.

Benefits include:

Substantial income potential by saving others money on utility services they already use.
Build your financial security – long-term monthly residual income.
Payment for results – generous bonuses paid monthly to achievers.
Substantial ongoing promotional bonuses (£250 – £20,000).
Very low initial deposit (only £200 – you get it back) and no stock to buy.
Minimal financial accounting – no cash to handle, just commission paid into your account.
You in the driving seat – no bosses or employees.
Flexible time – work part-time or full-time, it’s your choice.
Full training and support given – learn from the success of the Company’s top performers.
Benefit from the long term success of Telecom plus – earn equity share options
£20 billion market – virtually unlimited growth and income potential (currently only 1% market share).
100% credible opportunity – Telecom plus is an ethical, profitable and stock market listed British PLC.
Benefit from an innovative company car scheme.
Exciting incentives and rewards – holidays, cars, cash bonuses and more
Partner with one of the UK’s fastest growing companies.
Low risk to you – 75% of your deposit back if you change your mind within 90 days of joining.

Just follow the link and watch the video : http://www.extra1000.co.uk

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The River Wear – Mouth to Source

Posted in north east england, photography on June 30, 2009 – 12:00 am
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Wear 1 - The River Mouth

This is the first part of a series covering the big rivers of North East England, namely the Rivers Wear, Tees and Tyne.

I start with the River Wear.

The River Wear is 60 miles long, rising in the East Pennines near Wearhead, and reaches the North Sea at Sunderland. The mouth of the river is quite distinctive, with the piers protecting the entrance to the North Sea.  To the North of the river mouth is an area known as Monkwearmouth.  It was one of the three original settlements on the banks of the River Wear along with Bishopwearmouth and Sunderland, the area now known as the East End. It includes the area around St. Peter’s Church and was once the main centre of Wearside shipbuilding and coalmining in the town. It is now host to a campus of the University of Sunderland and the National Glass Centre. It is served by the three Church of England churches of the Parish of Monkwearmouth.

The locals of the area were called “Barbary Coasters”. The borough stretches from Wearmouth Bridge (centre of photograph) to the harbour mouth on the north side of the river and is one of the oldest parts of Sunderland.

To the left of the photograph is the Stadium of Light, which was opened on the site of the abandoned Wearmouth Colliery in July 1997, and is the home of the football club Sunderland A.F.C., who had previously played at Roker Park. Wearmouth Colliery was closed in December 1993, and had been in operation for over 100 years.

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Lupus could be responsible for Michael Jackson’s death

Posted in health, music on June 27, 2009 – 12:00 am
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Was the King of pop really felled by prescription drug abuse ? The people who speculated on this theory for his demise could be completely wrong! Instead, Michael Jackson could very well be the victim of the lupus he suffered from as a child.

Did you know that Jackson, was the victim of a rare auto-immune disease called lupus? Yes, according to his Wikipedia autobiography and as it turns out that sufferers from lupus frequently die in their 40s and 50’s from sudden heart attacks, caused by atherosclerosis.

Lupus is the cause of inflammation in many of the body’s organs including the arteries of the heart. These inflamed arteries then cause cholesterol to deposit on their arterial walls.The deposits of cholesterol can cause scarring, and the whole process primes the lupus victims for massive heart attacks, which are often asymptomatic beforehand.

Those with mild lupus, like Michael Jackson, are actually much more at risk for having a fatal heart attack, according to Dr Michael Lockshin, who is a rheumatologist at the Hospital for Special Surgery in New York City. The reason for this is because people who have a mild lupus are less likely to take any of the medications which would prevent inflammation of the organs and hence the catastrophic heart condition.

Auto-immune disease

Now if you don’t believe that Jackson had lupus consider this: Vitiligo, which Jackson also suffered from, resulting in the famous pigment loss in his skin, is also an auto-immune disease. Coincidentally, vitiligo and lupus are often diagnosed in the same person, explains Dr. Lockshin. In other words, it would not have been unusual for Michael Jackson to have suffered from both of these ailments. African-Americans are four times more like to be lupus victims than white Caucasians. However, lupus is far more common in women than men, but men do get it.

So would any abuse of prescription drugs have exacerbated the lupus? Only if demerol was injected intravenously into the system, would it also have damaged Jackson’s heart, according to Lockshin. Demerol injected into his muscles would not have played a deadly role and neither would drugs like Xanax and Zoloft.

Lupus also frequently causes some inflammation and pain in the joints, which could explain why Jackson was sometimes seen using a wheel chair. This might also explain why Jackson had not performed for some 12 years. Maybe it wasn’t just the stress of the molestation charges and court cases that forced him to put his performance career on hold. Maybe, he was simply unwilling to share his medical problems with the public.

Until a possible lupus-induced heart attack felled him, the King of Pop may have preferred to preserve the illusion that he was still, at least in some ways, invincible!

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